


Temporary Love

by hunterishere



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson, Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson (Broadway Cast) Actor RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst and Humor, Canon Compliant, Canon Universe, Christmas, Drugs, Family, Family Feels, Gen, Hanukkah, Holidays, Kleinsen, Light Angst, Mother-Son Relationship, Platonic Kleinsen, Pre-Canon, Weed, i invented her, i mean you can read into it as romance if you want, it doesnt have to be canon if you dont want it to be, jareds mom is sweet, mrs kleinman
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:06:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28097388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hunterishere/pseuds/hunterishere
Summary: Jared and Evan spend Hanukkah together in a log cabin, but the connections they build might not last outside of vacation. Slightly angsty because, you know... it's Dear Evan Hansen... lol. Good banter!
Relationships: Evan Hansen & Heidi Hansen, Evan Hansen & Jared Kleinman, Evan Hansen/Jared Kleinman, Evan Hansen/Zoe Murphy
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	Temporary Love

**Author's Note:**

> TW they smoke weed once, there are sexual jokes, Evan is generally anxious.  
> Yes I did name this after a Ben Platt song, sue me. I'm so happy this is being posted in time for Hanukkah! I'm not Jewish so if anything is incorrect or offensive please let me know! It has been edited by someone who is Jewish but still.

“Are you packed?” Heidi asked from another room.  
“Uh, yeah, I’m almost finished,” Evan responded. He sat in his bedroom, clothes strewn all over the floor. In fact, he was not anywhere near finished packing. For the first time in Evan’s 11 years of schooling, all of Hanukkah fell under winter break, which meant all of the celebrating could be done without worrying about school the next morning or finishing homework on time. Heidi thought it would be nice if they spent the whole holiday in a log cabin in the mountains. It’s not that Evan doesn’t love his mother, or Hanukkah, it’s just that the Kleinman’s will be coming as well.   
The Kleinman’s are perfectly nice for the most part, except for Jared. That sounds rude- but you have to understand the history between Evan and Jared. The Hansen’s and the Kleinman’s have been spending holidays together since Evan was about 7, which means Evan and Jared have developed somewhat of a brother-like relationship. Jared enjoys pushing Evan’s buttons (or just pushing Evan in general), and Evan enjoys aggressively ignoring Jared. It’s hard to blame Evan, Jared has an… interesting sense of humor. Jared once laughed while watching Cyberbully, and defends his actions to this day.  
Evan was deciding which clothes Jared would make fun of the least, not to mention finishing the gift he got for Jared. He decided long underwear was out of the running, but his fuzzy onesie was coming. Jared would probably only bring cargo shorts because he’s useless, so Evan decided to bring extra sweatpants. He was putting his copy of The Perks Of Being a Wallflower in the front pocket of his suitcase when Heidi poked her head into his room.  
“Have you wrapped your present for Jared yet?”  
“Not yet,” Evan admitted.  
“Well, we’re meeting with them in about fifteen minutes so if you want to keep the surprise you should get on that!” She smiled. Evan sighed. His mother was far more excited for this week than he was. To be honest, Evan had kind of splurged on this gift. He knew Jared was only a family friend, but Evan cared about him and wanted to be liked, plus Nintendo was having a sale. It’s not like Evan had anything else to spend his money on.

Evan sat in the backseat next to Jared, a box wrapped in decorative menorahs sitting in his lap. In past roadtrips, they would’ve bickered over who got to play music, but they’ve been on enough vacations together to know the best course of action is two different pairs of headphones. The soft sounds of Sufjan Stevens echoed through Evan’s ears as he watched the trees pass by. Jared wore big, chunky, bluetooth gamer headphones, while Evan wore crappy CVS earbuds. A hand on his knee disrupted Evan’s thoughts. He pulled an earbud out.  
“Hm?” He asked. His mother was turned all the way around in the passenger’s seat to look at him.   
“I was thinking you two could use this trip to bond, not just ignore each other and play games!”   
“Mom, neither of us are playing games…” Evan muttered.  
“Well, you know what I mean! Maybe this should be an electronics-free Hanukkah!” Suddenly, Jared was a part of this conversation.  
“WHAT?!” Jared exclaimed.  
“Ooh, good idea Heidi!” Ms. Kleinman said from behind the wheel.  
“Not good idea! I need to have access to my camp friends' discord server or else they will all bond without me! I need to maintain status if I want to be a CIT!”  
“It’s not like there’s going to be wifi there anyway,” Ms. Kleinman said nonchalantly.  
“WHAT?!” Jared and Evan both exclaimed, in unison this time.  
“Evan, honey, I told you about this last week, remember?”  
“Oh, yeah…” Evan didn’t remember. Heidi said a lot of things a lot of the time, and only about a third of them were true. Heidi said she would start taking pilates classes three years ago, and that Evan’s dad would come to visit for his birthday, and that Evan would have a good school year. It was in his own self interest that he stopped listening.  
“Well I was never informed of this!” Jared sounded upset.  
“I knew if I told you, you would refuse to come along,” Mrs. Kleinman said.  
“You were absolutely right! Turn around and take me home.”  
“Too late boyo, we’re already here,” Mrs. Kleinman said as she pulled into a parking space.   
“Hand me your phones boys,” Heidi said confidently, while everyone unbuckled.  
“That means your laptop too, Jared,” His mom added before exiting the vehicle. Jared groaned but obeyed, while Evan carefully wrapped his earbuds around his phone and placed it in Heidi’s hand.

“Why do you get the bedrooms?” Jared complained, once inside their assigned lodge.  
“Because we’re old and can’t climb the ladder to the loft,” Ms. Kleinman said.  
“Or sleep on the floor,” Heidi added.  
“Why couldn’t you have booked a cabin with four bedrooms?”  
“Do you want to pay for an upgrade?” Mrs. Kleinman asked with her hands on her hips. With a roll of his eyes Jared turned towards the ladder leading to the loft space him and Evan would be sleeping in.  
“How are we supposed to get our luggage up there?” Evan asked.  
“Uhhhh by carrying it?” Jared said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “You know, you’re lucky your mom puts up with you,” Jared said as he began to climb.  
“Me?! We’ve been here for approximately 2 minutes and you’ve already started complaining. I can’t imagine talking to my mom that way.”  
“That’s because your mom is Heidi Hansen and she gives you everything you ask for, there’s no reason to be rude.”  
“Aside from the fact that that’s not true-”  
“Watch it, Hansen, I have the power to drop my luggage on your head, you better agree with me,” Jared said as he made his way onto the actual platform of the loft.  
Evan stood for a minute, debating the best way to bring his suitcase up the ladder. Jared watched him look from suitcase to ladder for a full minute before loudly sighing and saying “Evan, would you like some help getting your stuff up here?”. Evan’s shoulders relaxed with relief.  
“Yes, please,” Evan spoke, handing his suitcase to Jared, who was halfway down the ladder.   
“Wow Jared, your arm is… surprisingly strong” Evan noticed.  
“Yeah it’s from all the beating off.”  
“Wh- Really? Are you bragging about this right now?”  
“No, not really, idiot,” Jared said.

Once both of the boys were settled with all of their things on the loft, there came an awkward air between them. The two of them hadn’t really been alone together in a few months and neither was sure what to say or do.   
“...What the hell are we supposed to do?” Jared said, finally.  
“I don’t know, hike?”  
“You want me to exercise? On break?”  
“Ok, what about reading”  
“You want me to READ? On BREAK?”  
“I don’t know Jared, stare at the ceiling for all I care,” Evan said as he opened his book.  
“Hmmmmm…” Jared pretended to think about it before saying “No.”  
“Jared, I’m trying to read.”  
“No you’re not, you’re just trying to ignore me. Besides, you’ve read that stupid walflower book a million times, you probably know it by heart. I probably know it by heart. Don’t you want to do something interesting?”  
“No, I want to read about Charlie starting high school.”  
“Ok well, don’t you want to entertain me?” Jared tried again with a fake, cheesy smile. Defeated, Evan put down his book.  
“Why do you suddenly want to hang out with me? Usually you avoid me like the plague.”  
“Maybe I got tired of your longing stares from across the room above your book.”  
“Jared!”  
“Ok! The truth is my plan was to play Fortnite this whole time and ignore everyone, but your mom decided to ruin that idea two seconds before we got here, and now I’m lost.” Evan took a deep breath.  
“Do… do you want to paint my nails?” Evan finally muttered.  
“WHAT?!” Jared yelled. Evan immediately regretted asking.  
“Yeah, nope, nevermind-” Evan started  
“Do you even have nail polish? When did this become a thing?”  
“Forget it, I don’t have nail polish, it was all a prank.”  
“You’re not getting off that easily, Hansen. How did I not know you like to paint your nails?”  
“Maybe because you go out of your way to not pay attention to me.” Evan muttered sarcastically.  
“Okay, smart ass, hand the polish over.”  
“...What?”  
“I’m bored, you want your nails painted, let’s do this.”  
“I told you I don’t even have any so you can just-”  
“I promise not to make fun of you. If you don’t let me do this I’ll just have to sit next to you and annoy you for the next week straight,” Jared said. Evan considered this. On one hand, there was absolutely no possibility that Jared would keep that promise. Jared made fun of the way Evan breathed, nail polish is just too easy. On the other hand, Jared really would bother him for the rest of the trip if he didn’t get to do this, and Evan’s nails were ugly and unpolished.  
“Ugh, I can’t believe I’m doing this but… fine.”  
“HOORAY!” Jared erupted.  
“You’re still not allowed to make fun of me,” Evan reminded him as he pulled a dark green bottle out of his bag.  
“We’ll see,” Jared responded. Evan handed him the bottle delicately.  
“It’s my only green so don’t spill it.”  
“Relax, I’ve got nimble, coding fingers.”  
“Yeah, and a strong masturbating arm.” Jared let out a billowing laugh.  
“No way did Evan Hansen just make a sex joke.”  
“I mean… technically I didn’t, I made a masturbation joke.”  
“A masturbation joke is a sex joke, you pillowcase.”  
“But I mean it’s not, ‘cause like, masturbation and sex are different-”  
“Hansen, please stop talking.” Evan shut his mouth tight. “Now,” Jared continued, “How do I do this?” He asked, gesturing at the nails and the nail polish.  
“What do you mean?”  
“How does one Paint Nails?”  
“It’s not rocket science you just-”  
“Ok well I’ve never done this before, help a brother out.”  
“You just like… do it.” Evan shrugged.  
“Wow. Very astute. I can see why you won that essay competition.”  
“Shut up and paint my nails!” Evan commanded.

When Jared was done, Evan was on his back, laughing so hard he had tears coming down his face.  
“What could possibly be so funny?” Jared asked, sounding annoyed.  
“You’re…” Evan wheezed, “You’re so bad at this!” He cackled.  
“Wh- I’m supposed to be the one making fun of you!”  
“There’s more paint on my skin than there is on my nails!” Evan laughed.  
“Speaking as someone who's seen you try to shoot hoops, you really have no right to be laughing at me.”  
“Don’t you take an art class? How can you have such an unsteady hand?”  
“It’s digital art,” Jared rolled his eyes, “And I maintain that you have no right to be making fun of me right now.”  
“Oh, come on Jared, don’t I deserve just one laugh at your expense?”  
“I oughta push you off this loft, you know that?”  
“Not if you want a car for your birthday. You have to be nice to me.” Evan said smugly.  
“Yeah, yeah,” Jared responded, before laying down beside Evan.  
“Why green?” Jared asked.  
“What?”  
“Why green? Don’t most people paint their nails black or something?”  
“Well… black makes me feel like Connor Murphy, and no offense to him but that’s… not what I’m going for.” Jared giggled at that. “I like green because it’s the color of leaves when they’re the most alive, you know?”  
“Nerd,” Jared said quietly.  
“Usually though, my nails are blue. I have like twelve different shades of blue at home.”  
“Oh my god, of course you do,” Jared said.   
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Evan asked, sitting up to get a proper look at Jared.  
“It means I’ve known you for almost a decade and I don’t think I’ve ever seen you wear another color,” Jared sat up now too.  
“You exaggerate.”  
“Take a look at your closet when you get home, tell me how many colors you see.”  
“I wear plenty of colors!”  
“Oh yeah, Evan Hansen is a real rainbow.” Jared mocked.

That evening, after sundown, the four of them gathered around the menorah and watched as Heidi lit the shamash, and then the farthest candle to the left. Jared had asked to light the candles, but he’s not allowed to handle fire after what happened to the menorah a few years ago. Jared swears he’ll do better now that he’s older, but based on the way Evans nails look, he doubts it. They listened to the blessings awkwardly, just like always. Truth be told, neither family was very religious, and Hanukkah really isn’t a big deal, but this trip was more of an excuse to get away for a week, so the blessings weren’t perfect.  
“Do we have any gifts tonight?” Jared asked his mother.  
“You have some gifts, but I’m not giving you one tonight. Too much complaining on the way here.”  
“But mom-”  
“Me and Heidi are going to watch the Twilight saga and I will not push it back because you want a new laptop from me, which you’re not getting by the way!” She informed him. Heidi made eye contact with Evan, silently asking if he wanted to give Jared his gift tonight, but Evan shook his head. He and Jared barely became friends again today, giving a gift might seem strange.

“Hey, Jared?” Evan’s voice sounded small in the dark loft.   
“What?” Jared groaned from his sleeping bag.  
“Are you asleep?”  
“Obviously not.”  
“No but I mean- Are you tired enough that me talking to you will be bothersome?”  
“Jesus, Evan, what do you want?”  
“I just… did you have a nice time? Today?”  
“What is this, the end of our first date? Sure, I guess I had fun.”  
“I mean, uh… was I like? Fun to hang out with?”  
“I guess so, yeah.”  
“So… maybe tomorrow we’ll hang out again?”  
“Unless you plan on leaving this family vacation early, yeah I think so.”  
“You know what I mean, Jared. You won’t ignore me?”  
“I still don’t have my laptop, do I?”  
“Is that really-”  
“Goodnight, Evan,” Jared said forcefully. Evan stared at the ceiling. He hoped there was more to their relationship than that. Maybe he was insane to get Jared anything at all. Maybe he would just keep the gift for himself instead of making everything awkward. Evan fell asleep to the voice in his head assuring him he would mess everything up.

Evan awoke with a start when his entire suitcase landed on his chest.  
“What the hell?!”  
“Good morning, Hansen!” Jared said, much too loudly.  
“What’s happening?” Evan asked groggily. Jared threw the curtains open, momentarily blinding Evan.  
“We, my friend, are going on a hike!” Jared sounded much too enthusiastic about an early morning hike.  
“Why?” Evan asked as he slowly sat up inside his sleeping bag.  
“Because we are on a beautiful mountain celebrating a beautiful holiday without electronics and we need to become one with nature or whatever,” Jared spewed. To Evan’s surprise, Jared had proper hiking gear on, complete with cargo pants (as opposed to shorts) and timberland hiking boots. Deciding to ignore the most prominent question in his brain, Evan asked a different one.  
“Ok but why did you throw my suitcase at me?”  
“That part was just fun,” Jared smiled. “Now come on! Get up! Get dressed! We have places to be!”  
“Do I at least get breakfast first?”  
“No!” Jared declared.

Once Evan was properly bundled and prepared, he and Jared set out on an adventure Evan knew nothing about.  
“Will you tell me why we-”  
“Nope.”  
“Well how about wher-”  
“Not a chance.”  
“What is this? Are you kidnapping me? During Hanukkah??”  
“This is a surprise, you idiot, besides, don’t you love hiking?”  
“If I stop asking questions will you let me talk about the types of plants around here?”  
“You can do whatever you want but I can’t promise not to clown you for it.”  
“I hate you,” Evan said playfully.  
The two of them walked until midday, sweaty despite the fact it was December. Jared led the way the whole time, surprising Evan with his knowledge of the area. Finally, Jared sat down on a log and patted the spot next to him.  
“Is this log the surprise?”  
“The surprise is not a location, but an… activity” with that, Jared pulled a plastic bag out of his pocket.  
“...Brussel sprouts?” Evan questioned  
“Dude, you need your eyes checked. This is some good, old fashioned, marijuana,” Jared announced. Evan’s eyes got big.  
“I don’t know if-”  
“Calm down, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. I for one am going to get high as a kite.” Evan was quiet for a long time, watching Jared roll himself a joint.  
“Where did you get this?” Evan asked, looking very interestedly at the joint-rolling process.  
“This guy that sits behind me in algebra offered me some,” Jared explained.  
“He just like, offered you drugs? In the middle of math class? Do you even know his name?”  
“It’s Max or Mitch or something, anyway he seemed kind of desperate for the money, and I’ve never tried it, so I splurged! For Hanukkah!”  
“Wait, I thought you smoked pot at camp? With that guy you were hooking up with?”  
“Uh, yeah, obviously I just meant… I haven’t tried it other than that time. At camp. Duh,” Jared said. Evan was skeptical.  
“And, for your information, only old people call it ‘pot’,” Jared added.  
“Oh. Well what should I call it?”  
“Weed,” Jared answered, matter of factly, as if he were quoting a textbook.  
“Okay then… I would like one… one weed then,” Evan said nervously.  
“One… weed?”  
“Yeah, you know, one of those,” Evan pointed at the joint in Jared’s hand.  
“You… yeah ok, whatever,” Jared laughed.   
“What? What did I do?”  
“These are called joints, dummy,” Jared said.  
“Oh. Then… one joint please.  
“Aye aye captain.”

Once Evan was holding the joint, he kind of almost felt like he might definitely throw up, but he didn’t want Jared to think he was a baby. Because he wasn’t a baby. And he definitely didn’t want to put the drugs away and tell his mom.  
“You ready?” Jared asked, despite the fact that Evan was very visibly not ready.  
“You go first,” Evan said.  
“Okay,” Jared tried to act cool, like he knew exactly how to do this, but he wasn’t totally convincing. He inhaled for a moment, looked toward the sky, and immediately began the worst coughing fit either boy had ever seen. Quickly, Evan handed him a canteen full of cold water. Once Jared was more or less able to breathe again, he managed to squeak out “You would have a canteen.”  
“Jared, if you make fun of me right now I will not hesitate to punch you in the lungs.” Jared laughed, which made him cough some more.  
“Your turn E-man,” Jared said. Evan’s face turned red.  
“I don’t actually think-”  
“Evan, I reacted like that because I have untreated asthma, and I’m a dick who took too big of a hit. If you want to do this, you’ll be fine.” Evan took a deep breath and stared hard at the joint, like it would give him answers.  
“Okay.” He whispered.  
“Okay?” Jared repeated, louder.  
“Okay!” Evan said.   
The pair quickly realized they did not require an entire joint each. They smoked until they felt like the world was moving in stop-motion, and put the joints away, hoping they could be saved for later, though neither one really knew.  
“How do you feel?” Asked Evan, after a long stretch of silence.  
“I feel like… like I’m on a really nice boat. Like a cruise,” Jared explained. “What about you?”  
“I don’t know if I like it,” Evan admitted.  
“Why?”  
“It didn’t make me calmer, it just made me… slower.”  
“It definitely made me calmer,” Jared responded.  
“Do you want to know a secret?” Evan asked, suddenly.  
“No,” Jared answered, though it didn’t seem like Evan heard him.  
“I have like… the biggest crush… on Zoe Murphy,” Evan giggled.  
“Isn’t she a freshman?” Jared asked.  
“Yeah, but we’re only sophomores. It’s not that weird. Is it?”  
“Nah, I guess not,” Jared said. “Do you want to know my secret?” Jared asked.  
“Absolutely” Evan answered.  
“I have no idea where we are… or how to get back to the cabin,” Jared laughed like it was the funniest joke in the world. Watching Jared laugh made Evan laugh.  
“I thought…” Evan paused to laugh some more, “I thought you knew the area so well… I was so impressed...” The two of them were crying.  
“I literally wandered around blindly… for like two hours.”

“Are my eyes red?” Jared asked, as Evan packed up the supplies they had brought along. Evan stared at his eyes for an awkwardly long amount of time.  
“No.” He finally decided. “Is that like a thing? Like a p- weed thing?” Evan asked.  
“Yeah,” Jared answered, tiredly.  
“Are my eyes red?” Evan asked. Jared glanced at him before saying, “Yeah a little, but we can just say you were crying. That’s definitely believable,” Jared poked.  
“I don’t cry that much,” Evan defended.  
“Yeah… you really do.” Jared argued as they started walking.  
“So you really don’t have any idea how to get back?” Evan changed the subject.  
“I… am sure I might be able to figure it out.”  
“Jared-”  
“It’ll be fine, I’ll figure it out, I promise.” Evan was too sleepy to argue. He worried silently, following Jared’s aimless trail.

After about seven wrong turns, they did make it back to the cabin safely.  
“I knew you guys would bond!” Heidi exclaimed when they opened the door. Jared and Evan gave each other a confused look before turning back to Ms. Hansen. “It’s not like you two go on day long hikes very often! What did you do, have a picnic?” She asked.  
“Uhhh…” Evan hated lying to his mother.  
“Yeah, we did, but we’re really tired out now from all the walking so I think we’re just going to take a nap.” Jared jumped in.  
“Good idea!” Heidi smiled, “You’re going to want to be awake for the lighting of the menorah tonight,” She winked at Evan, though he probably didn’t notice.  
“Your mom is disgustingly oblivious.”  
“Don’t call my mom disgusting.” Evan lightly pushed Jared.

Evan dreamt of a beach with black sand and black water, but the brightest blue sky he had ever seen. Jared dreamt that binary code was falling from the sky, but it landed soft on his skin. 

“Boys!” Came a voice from downstairs. “Menorah time!” Jared and Evan rolled out of their sleeping bags and practically fell down the ladder. They were standing zombies during the blessing. It wasn’t so much the weed as it was any other post-nap daze. Evan perked up when his mother pulled a box with wrapping paper out from under the table.  
“I know we said we weren’t doing presents,” (they say this every holiday), “But I did get you a little something.” She pushed the box toward him excitedly. Normally she would get him a used pair of khakis, or a phone call from dad. The box was small, but dense. Evan removed the wrapping paper, careful to keep it intact for later use. When he was done he saw it was a book of poems.  
“You did so well in that essay contest recently, I thought you might be interested in literature! It might be stupid, I included a gift receipt.”   
“This is so thoughtful, mom,” Evan told her, sincerely. “I… I don’t really know what to say.”  
“That’s alright, honey, I’m glad you like it.” Evan was grateful for the Kleinman’s friendly bickering because it saved him from the awkward silence that would’ve followed in his own home. Neither Evan nor Heidi were great at talking, but it worked out in their little family.

“Two days down and still no laptop,” Jared announced as he flopped onto the couch.  
“I really don’t think your mom is giving you a laptop,” Evan said from beside him.  
“Ah, but you don’t have the Kleinman touch.” Evan took a very annoyed sigh before asking: “What’s the Kleinman touch?”  
“I’m so glad you asked!” Jared bounced. “In the Kleinman family, we all have just a touch of telepathy.”  
“Oh, bullshit.”  
“Not bullshit, Hansen. For my eleventh birthday, I was positive my dad was getting me a razor scooter!”  
“Did you get one?”  
“...No, but I did get a bike! Which is pretty close!”  
“Where is your dad anyway?” Evan asked, suddenly.  
“He has work, you know that.”  
“Has he ever come on one of these trips with us?”  
“Um… I don’t think so.”  
“Doesn’t that bother you?” Evan asked. Jared shifted uncomfortably.  
“I don’t know, not really I guess. Didn’t we come in here to watch a movie?”  
“Don’t you want to… you know, talk about this?”  
“Look Evan, just because your dad left doesn’t mean mine is going to, ok? Now are we going to watch Scott Pilgrim or not?” That shut Evan up. Jared knew it would. They watched the movie, but neither of them laughed at the funny parts.   
The two of them got ready for bed in a loud silence. It wasn’t until they were laying on the ground, in the dark, for the second night in a row, that either spoke another word.  
“You’re not tired really yet, are you?” Jared asked.  
“Does it matter?” Evan said, sharply.  
“It’s just that… we napped not long ago… so I assume you’re just as awake as I am.”  
“Leave me alone, Jared.”  
“If you wanted to… play go fish or something, I would join you.” Evan sat up, he could barely make out Jared’s shape in the darkness.  
“Go fish? Really?” Evan laughed. “That’s the best card game you could think of?”  
“Don’t laugh at me!” Jared sat up, laughing as well.  
“Not like crazy eights or something? You want to play go fish?”  
Evan knew this was Jared’s way of apologizing. They never talked about it, but they both knew. When one of them would fuck up, they would be quiet for awhile, until they felt they needed each other again. It was the circle of friendship with them. Or… family-friendship.  
They didn’t play go fish, but they stayed up talking. Jared would never admit it, but he really did enjoy spending time with Evan. If he had his laptop, he would probably be showing Evan his favorite twitch streamers. By the time they were back in their sleeping bags with the lights off, it was after midnight.  
“Do you think we’re bad people?” Evan asked.  
“What?”  
“For like… doing drugs on a family trip?”  
“Evan, I think we’re bad people for much greater reasons than smoking weed on vacation.”  
“Oh, how comforting,” Evan said sarcastically.  
“I wouldn’t worry about it. You’re pretty good at keeping out of trouble,” Jared concluded.

A loud kazoo sounded next to Evan’s ear.  
“Jared, I’m going to kill you,” He said into his pillow.  
“I look forward to it!” Jared shoved Evan.  
“Why did you even bring a kazoo on this stupid trip?”  
“To have fun waking you up, of course.”  
“Must you torture me this holy week?”  
“Yes. Besides, this week isn’t all that holy.”  
“Well it’s a vacation, and I have no homework, and I deserve to sleep in.”  
“You deserve all of my wonderful jokes, Evan Hansen.”  
“I’m thrilled,” Evan deadpanned.   
“Get up, your mom made jelly donuts!”  
“Eat them without me.”  
“And risk you complaining for the next six days that we didn’t save you any? Not a chance.” Begrudgingly, Evan got up and walked sock-footed to the kitchen. Admittedly, it did smell spectacular. While Heidi was an amazing chef, she never had the opportunity to use her skills because work kept her so busy. Seeing her in a flour covered apron made Evan feel at home.   
“Wow mom, it smells… amazing in here,” Evan mused.  
“I know, right? It’s been too long since I did some baking,” she responded. Jared grabbed one of the finished donuts and took a smug bite.  
“Let her finish the batch first, Jared!” Ms. Kleinman chastised from the island.  
“But this one is already so warm and… in my mouth,” Jared countered, shoving the majority of the donut into his mouth.  
“So you’re going to disrespect the chef and make a mess? There’s crumbs all over you-”  
“Relax, mom, I’ll clean it up,” Jared said with a smile, “And thank you Ms. Hansen!” and with that he was off, running in the direction of the room with a couch and a TV.  
“Oh, go on Evan, take one!” Heidi said.  
“Oh but- you said we should wait until-”  
“Take one and go hang out with your friend, or I’ll do it for you,” she joked. Evan blushed and took a donut (and a napkin, not everyone is as much of a slob as Jared Kleinman), and joined Jared in the living room.  
“I’m thinking we have a lazy day today,” Jared proclaimed.  
“Does that mean I can go back to sleep?” Evan asked with a yawn.  
“Since when do you sleep in? Evan Hansen is not lazy!”  
“Since when don’t you sleep in?”  
“Since your mom stole my computer and hindered me from playing games into the wee hours of the night.” Evan rolled his eyes.  
“So what are we going to do on this lazy day?”  
“We are going to watch movies and play games.”  
“Isn’t that… what we do everyday?”  
“Yes, but this time we’re in a new environment.”  
“So?”  
“So! Cards against humanity in a beautiful wooden loft in the snow is more fun than cards against humanity in your basement!” This made Evan groan.  
“Jared, I hate cards against humanity.”  
“I know, but I love it!”  
“What if my mom hears us?”  
“Then she’ll laugh and be glad you’re being a real teenager!”  
“Can’t we do something I enjoy for once?”  
“Tomorrow can be Evan-day, but remember that we already hiked.”  
“We could do it again-”  
“No, we can not,” Jared said with a smile.   
While the pair played cards against humanity, Evan planned his day of fun. He decided there would be a bonfire, and reading, and at least an hour of silence from Jared. Evan lost cards against humanity (too scared to be offensive), and allowed Jared to pick the movie as a prize.  
“What about Frozen?” Jared asked.  
“Really? Is your sole purpose in life to annoy me?”   
“Yes. What’s wrong with Frozen?”  
“It’s just so… cheesy.”  
“You of all people must understand the appeal of disney, right?”  
“I don’t know… Inside Out is pretty good, but stuff like Frozen? Just isn’t my thing.”  
“Today, Frozen becomes ‘your thing’,” Jared decided, as he selected the movie on the screen in front of them. Evan had to admit, the music was catchy, and Olaf was quite lovable. The best part of the movie was watching Jared react with his whole body.  
“No!” he cried when Anna turned to ice.  
“Haven’t you seen this before? You knew what was going to happen,” Evan asked.  
“Shut up,” Jared squeaked.  
“ARE YOU CRYING??”  
“No,” Jared said, before rubbing his eyes. Evan had forgotten how much fun Jared could be when he wasn’t trying to impress everyone around him. If Jared acted this way at school, Evan was sure he would have more friends. Although, Evan did not have many friends himself, so maybe his opinion meant nothing.  
“I didn’t hate it as much as I thought I would,” Evan admitted. The boys were lounging in the living room, regularly grabbing jelly donuts off the tray on the coffee table.  
“I mean, when Hans betrays Anna like that, doesn’t your heart just shatter? WHEN HE LEAVES OLAF TO MELT? Best movie ever.”  
“It’s alright”  
“You’re the most emotional person I know, you have no right to slander this movie.”  
“I just said it was alright!”  
“Frozen deserves at least an ‘amazing’.”

That night, after the lighting of the third candle, Jared got a graphic t-shirt, and Evan got a pair of pants identical to all the ones he already owned.   
“Wanna trade?” Jared asked. Evan scoffed.  
“Yeah, because I want a fortnight shirt,” Evan shot back.  
“Oh, pardon me, you definitely need another pair of beige pants, sorry I even asked.”  
“We’re not the easiest to shop for, are we?” Evan sighed. Jared laughed before answering “I guess not. Good thing we don’t have to get gifts for each other.” Evan stayed pointedly silent, once again rethinking his present choice. When Evan didn’t say anything, Jared kept going. “I would’ve gotten you an alarm clock, sleepyhead,” punctuated with an elbow in the shoulder.   
“I do not sleep that late, you’re just insane.”  
“Keep telling yourself that.”

Evan opened his eyes slowly. The sun was bright on his sleeping bag, which meant someone had to have opened the curtains. He looked to his left and saw Jared mindlessly messing with a rubix cube beside him.  
“No obnoxious wake up call this morning?” Evan asked.  
“Nah, it’s Evan-day, remember? Your extra special treat is not being attacked at 8 am.”  
“Wait- we’re actually doing this… this Evan-day thing?”  
“Yeah unless you don’t want to, ‘cause I can-”  
“No! No, I want to! I just wasn’t expecting you to… follow through? I guess?”  
“I’m not a gigantic dick.”   
“Yeah, you kind of are,” Evan said with a laugh.  
“Okay, fair. But I’m not an enormous dick, so today is all you. What’s first, Hansen?”

“I can’t believe your idea of a fun day is hanging out with your mom,” Jared mocked.  
“Awww, I think it’s sweet!” Heidi countered, “We haven’t been spending enough time together on this ‘family vacation’,” she used air quotes around “family vacation”. Evan sunk farther into his foldable chair than he thought possible. He hadn’t wanted to start the fire himself, and he certainly wasn’t going to leave it in Jared’s hands, so he asked the adults for help. He hadn’t actually expected them to stay after the fire was going. He supposed it was his own fault for accidentally inviting them.  
Evan genuinely did enjoy spending time with his mother, and wished he could do it more often. But… Jared and Heidi together created an energy he wasn’t quite sure how to deal with. On one hand, Jared made him want to do something risky, like smoke weed in the woods, or watch a movie rated NC-17. But Evan’s mom made him want to curl up and share school-appropriate stories. There wasn’t much conversation to be had between them all.  
“I for one, am jealous,” Ms. Kleinman said, “My Jared would never voluntarily spend time with me” she laughed.  
“That’s just not true,” Jared said from across the fire, “We went mini golfing that one time, just the two of us, remember?”  
“Jared, that was Mothers’ Day four years ago, and I had to beg you to come with me.” Jared looked defeated.   
Evan suddenly saw an opening for some fun, and took it. Many people might believe that Evan is a kind and respectful young man, but he was just as mischievous as any other fifteen year old boy. He loved to see other people get uncomfortable for a change, especially when “people” meant Jared Kleinman.  
“So, Mrs. Kleinman-” Evan started.  
“Oh, sweetie, please, call me Emily!”  
“E-Emily,” He continued, “Tell me about Jared when he was younger. Like, a baby. Before we knew each other” Jared glared at Evan so hard, you’d think lazer beams would shoot out and kill him instantly. If there’s one thing Evan knew about mothers, it was that they loved accidentally embarrassing their children.  
“Oh my gosh, he was the clingiest little baby you’ve ever seen!” She began, “He didn’t stop breastfeeding until he was 4!” Jared looked like he wanted to unzip his skin and crawl away.

“Hansen!” Jared said between clenched teeth.  
“Yes?” Evan asked, with fake innocence.  
“I am never going to forgive you”  
“For what? For a lovely afternoon around the bonfire?”  
“For making me freeze my ass off while listening to my mom talk about breastfeeding!”  
“Aw, but you were so cute! You loved your mothers milk!”  
“Evan, I swear to God, I will strangle you.”  
“Not if you want a car you won’t!” Evan smirked.  
“Evan-day is over, it’s cancelled, you lost your privileges.”  
“No! I had hours of silent reading planned!”  
“Exactly” Jared stated.

But Jared ended up letting Evan read anyway. Up in their loft, with a little booklight, until the sun had set. He couldn’t be sure, but Evan thought he might’ve even felt Jared reading over his shoulder. Of course, Jared hadn’t brought a book, so he busied himself by doodling in Evan’s notebook until he had just about lost it.  
“Are you done yet? That book is so short you have to have finished it by now”  
“I’m only at the part where Patrick gets broken up with, so no.”  
“That’s only like halfway! What have you been doing all this time?”  
“You actually know the sequence of events of The Perks Of Being A Wallflower?”  
“Duh, there’s a movie, and you’re always talking about it.” Evan was pleasantly surprised. He didn’t know Jared listened to his book rants. He only used to talk about it years ago, before he learned that no one really cared. But Jared remembered.   
“I don’t care that you’re not finished,” Jared said, finally. He took the book right out of Evan’s hands, and ignored Evan’s protests.  
“Evan-day is over, and I am bored. Entertain me.”  
“How am I supposed to do that?” Evan actually put quite a lot of effort into being as normal and boring as possible, which meant he wasn’t an expert at hanging out.  
“Do you wanna…… start a forest fire?” Jared asked. Evan quite literally could not tell if he was joking.  
“You are a chaos demon,” Evan responded,  
“Yeah, and you’re true neutral, which is like, a lot worse.”  
“Is it though?”  
“Definitive yes. At least chaos demons have fun.” Maybe Jared was right. Evan didn’t have much fun in his life. He tried so hard to be likeable, but where were his friends? Maybe being likable was overrated.  
“You know what? You’re exactly right.”  
“Wait… what?” Jared sat up straight with wide eyes.  
“You’re right. I’m boring. Let’s have fun.”  
“You actually listened to me? And now you’re agreeing? What world are we living in?”  
“Come on, Jared, what’s the plan? What are we going to fuck up tonight?” A wide grin took over Jared’s face. “Want to steal our electronics back from your mom?”

That’s how Evan ended up standing in the closet in the room his mother had been using. He heard muffled voices from beyond the thin door.  
“We were thinking of lighting the menorah soon, have you seen Evan?” Heidi asked.  
“Uhm! Actually, I think he ran to the bathroom rather…. uh…. urgently. So maybe we should wait a little while.” Said Jared. Evan cringed at the excuse.  
“Oh no, do you think he’s alright? Was it my cooking?”  
“No! No, nothing like that. It’s probably just… nerves.”  
“Nerves? What does Evan have to be nervous about?”  
“Oh, you know… just… being Evan, right? You know how he is…”  
“I guess… did something set him off?” Evan was silently banging his head against the wall at the whole conversation. Leave it to Jared Kleinman to bring diarrhea and his diagnosed anxiety disorder into the (very short) conversation.  
“I don’t know, sometimes it’s hard to tell, you know? Anyways, I’m sure everything will be fine. Did you need help in the kitchen?” Evan let out a slow breath of relief as he heard the voices receding. He tiptoed into the room and ever so carefully made his way to the dresser.  
“Yeah, sure thing!” Evan heard. He froze. He had nowhere to hide. Under the bed? No, it would take too long. Before he had a chance to figure something out, the door opened.  
“Jared!” Evan whispered.  
“What? I’m here to help.” Jared whispered back.  
“Don’t scare me like that, I thought my mom was coming back in!”  
“I did a pretty good job talking her out of the room though, didn’t I?”  
“Did you have to tell her I was having diarrhea?”  
“Well I didn’t say that-”  
“You implied-” both of them stopped short when they heard a noise outside the room.  
“Okay, whatever just, let’s get this over with,” Evan decided.  
“I thought you wanted to have a thrill, Hansen.”  
“Shut up and help me open this drawer without letting it creak.” Evan pulled the handle while Jared held the side. It was a slow process, and Evan couldn’t stop looking over his shoulder. Once they finally got the drawer open, only the bare wood stared back at them.  
“It must be in a different drawer,” Evan said. But they opened every one and Jared’s laptop was nowhere to be found.  
“Maybe it’s in her suitcase” Jared suggested.  
“I’m not digging through my moms suitcase, her underwear is in there!”  
“Well I have no problem-”  
“BOYS! MENORAH!” Came a call from the middle of the lodge. They froze. The two of them shared a look for a moment, before Jared shrugged and sauntered out of the room like he owned the place.   
“Happy fourth day of Hanukkah, amigos,” Jared announced as he entered the room.   
Jared and Evan stifled their giggles all through the blessings, and went to bed with no presents, content as could be.

“WHAT THE FUCK?” Jared yelled.  
“PAYBACK” Evan screamed.  
“Nothing. I mean nothing I’ve done to wake you up, is that level of evil.”  
“Oh, please-”  
“Evan, I am soaking wet, and freezing, and it is 7:30 am. I hate you.”  
“No you don’t.”  
“Yes. Yes I do.”  
“Go take a warm shower and tell me how you feel after.”

“I cannot believe Evan Hansen poured ice water on me at 7:30 in the morning.”  
“I can’t believe Jared Kleinman is still talking to me.”  
“Yeah, me either,” Jared said. Evan reached over and mussed up Jared’s wet hair.  
“You know, everyone at school thinks you’re a perfect angel,” Jared said, annoyed.  
“No one at school thinks anything about me at all,” Evan responded.  
“Maybe that’s true. But our parents both definitely think you’re a perfect angel.”  
“My mom absolutely does not think I’m perfect.”  
“Heidi Hansen couldn’t think anything negative about you if she tried!”  
“I’m… a lot more trouble than you probably think I am,” Evan laughed awkwardly. Jared let out a gigantic cackle.  
“W-what?” Evan asked.  
“You think I don’t know how much trouble you are?” Jared said. “I have witnessed countless panic attacks, housed you when you ran away, attempted to show you a horror movie, I have been pranked by you, planned pranks with you- Evan, I know how much trouble you are. My point is, Heidi doesn’t care.”  
“I… I don’t-”  
“Gross, don’t act like I just complimented you.” Not knowing what to do, Evan sat there, red-faced and silent.   
“Do you want to go skiing?” Jared asked, abruptly. That shocked Evan out of his own head.  
“There’s skiing here?” Evan questioned.  
“Of course, Hansen, that's like… the whole point. Of this entire lodge. Why did you think this was a vacation spot in the first place?”  
“I don’t know, it’s pretty and there’s a fireplace and stuff?”  
“We are literally in a wooden cabin in the woods in December and you didn’t think there would be skiing?”  
“Okay, okay! I get it! No, I don’t want to go skiing.”  
“Wow, that’s too bad, because you’re going skiing today.”  
“Will you ever stop making decisions for me?”  
“We established on Evan-day that you are awful at making decisions, so no.”  
“Ugh, but we did something interesting yesterday, can’t we do something boring today?”  
“Failing at stealing your phone is not interesting! Today, we ski. Tomorrow, we take on the world.”

“Hey, what are you boys all bundled up for?” Ms. Kleinman asked.  
“We are taking advantage of the slopes!” Jared announced.  
“Ooh, be careful! Stay on the bunny slopes please, I don’t want anyone getting hurt!”  
“Heidi, they’ll be fine” Mrs. Kleinman assured.  
“Okay… off we go… to ski… which both of you are totally okay with… and allowing us to do…” Evan said.  
“Hansen, you are not getting out of this. To the slopes!” Jared literally pulled Evan out of the lodge.

One thing Jared seemed to have conveniently forgotten, was Evan’s fear of heights. To be fair, Evan was afraid of most things. That didn’t negate the anxiety Evan experienced at the peak of the ski lift.  
“Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod,” Evan cried, clinging to Jared’s arm.  
“You’re a giant baby, you know that?”  
“Yes, I’m aware, please go without me and let me die on this endless loop of hell,” Evan shut his eyes tight, as if there were a scary monster in front of him.  
“Relax, we’re almost there.”  
“Why does this thing take 8 million years?”  
“Because there’s 8 million people on it, all of which will be fine, because ski lifts are perfectly safe.”  
“I don’t believe you.”  
“Open your eyes, it’s time.”  
“OHMYGOD!” Evan screamed.   
“Okay just… have your feet ready and just-” Evan promptly fell directly on his face.  
“You’re laughing at me. There’s snow in my mouth, and you’re laughing at me.”  
“Half the fun of hanging out with you is getting to laugh at you. Here, come on-” Jared held his hand out and pulled Evan off the ground.  
“Now we can just slide all the way down this very mild hill,” Jared said.  
“Mild? This thing is a death trap!”  
“This is the easiest hill in the whole place, Evan. A literal toddler just passed us with confidence. The hardest part about skiing down this hill is going to be the lack of momentum-”  
“Okay! Let’s just… now I can just…”  
“Okay, you know what?” And with that, Jared gave Evan a small push.

“I’M ACTUALLY KING OF THE WORLD!”   
“Whatever you need to tell yourself”  
“DID YOU SEE ME? I’M THE BEST SKIER THAT’S EVER SKIED!”  
“Mhm…”  
“NO ONE AND NOTHING WILL EVER BEST ME!”  
“So, are you ready to go again?”  
“What? Oh, God no! No, never ever again.”  
“I thought you were king of the world?”  
“The king of the world needs to stay off of death traps like that,” Evan said, pointing at the ski lift. “I may be the most amazing bunny-sloper in the world, but I’m the worst ski slope rider. No, I’m going back to the cabin.”  
“We just got here!” Jared complained, not unlike a child.  
“Well I’m not riding that again.”   
“We spent like an hour getting prepared for the snow, we're not just going back to the cabin.”

“Jared, look! They’re holding hands!” Evan stepped aside to show off his finished snowmen, complete with two stick hands touching each other.  
“What are they like… gay?” Jared asked. Evan stared at him blankly.  
“Jared you’re literally… you’re gay.”  
“No I’m not!”  
“You-? You came out to me in eighth grade?”  
“I may be exclusively attracted to men, but that does not make me gay.”  
“You’re exhausting. Yes, my snowmen are gay. Cry about it.”  
“Well my snowman… is actually a snowwoman!” Jared’s smile was so huge you would think he won the lottery, as he stepped back to reveal a human-like snow figure with absolutely gigantic boobs.  
“I… have no words”  
“You never do. It’s ok, I have enough words for the both of us,” Jared joked.  
“Why would you… you really are exhausting.”  
“You have no idea,” Jared smiled as he threw a snowball at Evan’s face, with full force.  
“You’re absolutely the worst!” Evan said, as he began chasing Jared. Evan managed to get one handful of snow down Jared’s shirt before being pelted again.  
The two of them played in the snow like children, even stopping to make snow angels. For a period of time, they both forgot about the stress of life outside the cabin. In that moment, they were just two friends, allowing themselves to have fun. Neither worried about whether they were friends or merely family-friends, neither thought about the tests they would endure when school started again, neither let their anxieties of home life take over their minds. They smiled at each other and watched the snow fall through the mountain air. They even managed to forget they were freezing cold.

“Oh, you’re back!” Heidi hugged each of them tighter than strictly necessary.  
“I figured you’d be cold after spending all day in the snow, so I made some hot chocolate! I thought you would be back earlier so… they might not be warm enough anymore, but I’m more than happy to pop them in the microwave if-”  
“Thank you so much, mom,” Evan interrupted, “You’re the best. Really.”  
“Wow… thanks. I love you honey…” Heidi looked like she might cry. Evan didn’t blame her. It wasn’t often Evan expressed his love for his mother. Everything always felt too awkward, and he would let the moment pass without letting her know how much she meant to him. Usually, when he did try to tell her, he would stumble over his words so bad it was hard to understand what he was saying. But it also wasn’t often that Evan truly let go of his worries and just had fun. He was feeling generous.  
“I… I don’t really… let me just warm these up for you guys,” Heidi picked up the mugs (one with an E and one with a J, brought from home) and hurried off towards the microwave.  
“I think you killed her,” Jared whispered.  
“I wish she’d kill me,” Evan whispered back. Jared chuckled.

“Okay, so…” Emily Kleinman said, after the blessings of that evening, “It’s no laptop, but. I thought you might like it anyway.” She humbly presented a beautiful, hardcover set of every book in the Percy Jackson series.  
“You didn't,” Jared said with wide eyes. He took the box gingerly and examined the spines with aw.  
“I might’ve. I hope you like them,” Emily said.  
“Jared, I thought you didn’t like reading?” Heidi questioned. Jared, in response, continued to stare at the books as if they were made of stars.  
“He read these before he realized reading wasn’t ‘cool’,” Emily answered, in a hushed voice.   
Evan had always been more of a Harry Potter person, himself, but of course he appreciated a beautiful matching box set of any series, especially one as iconic as Percy Jackson.  
“Can I see them?” Evan timidly asked.  
“Over my dead body,” Jared answered. He seemed to be stuck in a trance-like state, even an hour after he had received the gift.  
“Jared, I just want to-”  
“If you ever touch these I will strangle you with my bare hands. Should I reread the entire Percy Jackson series right now?” Evan sighed. It was clear he wasn’t going to get any entertainment out of Jared tonight.   
“Read out loud, Evan said, settling into his sleeping bag. Jared looked away from the books for the first time since they lit the menorah. “What?”  
“Read The Lightning Thief out loud to me, right now. I barely remember it.”  
“Really?” Jared looked like a puppy.  
“Yeah. You always listened to my book rants, so I want to return the favor. Let’s read The Lighting Thief.”  
“I- ...alright,” Jared smiled behind his book, and started over from page one. The boys read into the wee hours of the night.

An alarming series of sneezes from Evan’s side of the lost roused Jared out of his sleep. He tried to ignore it, he really did, but the sneezing seemed to be endless.  
“Dude, what the fuck? Are you like… good?” Evan sneezed again before responding with a groan.  
“Is that… a yes?”  
“Do I seem good, Jared?” Came a congested voice from inside Evan’s sleeping bag.  
“You’re not sick…”  
“I think I am.”  
“That’s not allowed! It’s vacation! It’s… it’s Hanukkah! You can’t be sick!”  
“You’re the one who kept me out in the cold for hours and then,” Evan paused to sneeze a few more times “... and then read to me until like 3 am.” Evan peeked out of his sleeping bag to shoot a glare at Jared.  
“You asked me to read to you!”  
“I still blame you.”  
“This is slander.”  
“Die.”

In what felt like the blink of an eye, Evan found Jared shuffling around next to him. Evan closed his eyes, fully intending to go back to sleep, when he heard something clink onto the floor beside him.  
“I made you soup,” Jared said, suspiciously monotonous.  
“Why?” Evan questioned.  
“To practice my dream of becoming a chef,” Jared responded sarcastically.  
“Don’t look at me like that! Eat your stupid soup!” The broth was warm but not too hot, and it admittedly did sooth Evan.  
“Since you went and broke the rules and got sick, I broke the rules too, and I’m giving you a gift,” Jared said, busying himself on his side of the loft.  
“There was a no-gifts rule?” Evan asked.  
“It was an unspoken bro rule. But I broke it now so… deal with it.” Jared’s awkwardness made Evan snort. It was nice for him to not be the awkward one for once.  
“Well I’m not great at detecting unspoken rules, so I guess I broke it too.” Jared abruptly looked up at Evan.  
“You got me a Hanukkah present?”  
“Yeah, why do you sound so surprised?”  
“Well- Because- Wait. You’ve had a present for me this whole time and you haven’t given it to me yet?!”  
“It felt… awkward.”  
“Everything you ever do is awkward, that's not an excuse! What is it?”  
“I’m not going to tell you,” Evan rolled his eyes.  
“Yes you are!”  
“I’m sick, you’re required to do what I tell you,” Evan frowned.  
“Nu-uh! We already had an Evan-day! What is it?” Jared was literally jumping now.  
“I’m going back to sleep,” Evan mumbled.  
“You’re lame,” Jared said before letting Evan rest.

“Hey sweetie,” Heidi’s voice slithered into Evan’s dream. He opened his eyes to find his mother squatting beside him. The empty bowl of soup had been removed.  
“Mom?” Evan asked, “I thought it was too hard to climb the ladder?”  
“Well, I figured it out. I’m worried about you.”  
“I’m fine,” Evan assured.  
“I don’t know, you’ve been sleeping all day.” Heidi sounded worried.  
“Wait what? What time is it?”  
“It’s about 4:30. Do you feel warm?” Heidi put her hand on Evan’s forehead to check.  
“Not really…” Evan answered.  
“I don’t think you have a fever. Just keep resting, ok? If you still feel bad tomorrow I’m taking you home early.”  
“Mom, I promise I’m fine.”  
“I know, honey.” Heidi had love in her voice. As soon as Evan’s head hit the pillow again he was asleep.

Evan was abruptly pulled out of his sleep by a round of particularly violent sneezes. Jared said bless you from across the room, Sea Of Monsters open in front of him. Evan groaned before asking, “What time is it?”  
“It’s about 7:30,” Jared answered. Evan yawned and sat up.  
“Do you want to light the menorah now?” He asked. Jared finally looked up from his book.  
“Is that a joke?”  
“...No?” Evan responded, confused.  
“You’re sick, you’re going to sleep for as much longer as it takes for you to heal. You’re not going to be at the menorah tonight,” Jared said all this as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.  
“That’s not how Hanukkah works,” Evan argued.  
“Since when are you a model jew? Go back to sleep!”  
“No,” Evan said, his mind now set on the challenge, “We’re lighting the menorah.” From downstairs Evan heard his mother calling to him, “Evan? What are you doing?”  
“He’s stubborn!” Jared yelled from the loft.  
“I’m ready to light the menorah,” Evan said, once he was on the floor.  
“I… think we all kind of assumed you would miss it tonight,” Heidi said.  
“Well, I’m here, so let’s get this baby going.”

Eventually everyone stopped arguing with him and they lit the menorah as quickly as possible. Once they had finished, Mrs. Kleinman began to rush Evan back to sleep.  
“What about gifts?” Jared asked, urgently.  
“We’re skipping them tonight, Evan needs his rest.”  
“What? No! Evan said he got me something, I want to know what it is!” Jared complained.  
“I’m not giving it to you tonight anyway,” Evan told him.  
“But that’s not-”  
“Honey, let him rest so he can enjoy the rest of his vacation,” Emily scolded.  
“Well… in that case, you’re not getting your gift tonight either!”  
“Okay,” Evan shrugged.

“Pssssst,” Evan whispered. When he was met with silence, we scooted over to Jared and gave him a poke.   
“Hey,” Evan whispered, “Hey, are you awake?” Jared groaned softly.  
“I am now,” He responded.  
“I can’t sleep,” Evan muttered.  
“Aren’t you sick?” Jared turned to face away from Evan.  
“I guess I slept it off, and I slept all day and now I’m awaaaake,” Evan pouted like a child.  
“I don’t care,” Jared slurred through sleepiness.  
“Yes you do, because if you don’t entertain me you know I’ll just keep annoying you,” Evan threatened. Jared reluctantly sat up and looked at Evan in the darkness.  
“What do you want?” Jared interrogated.  
“...Read to me.”  
“What.” It didn’t come out like a question, it came out flat, like roadkill.  
“You know…” Evan had lost the confidence it took to wake Jared up, “Pick up where we left off in The Lightning Thief,” Evan fidgeted with his hoodie strings. Jared thought about it for a moment before rolling his eyes.  
“If I read to you, will you promise to give me my present tonight?”  
“Pinky promise,” Evan smiled. Jared thought he was using a figure of speech until he saw Evans pinky extended in front of him. Jared looked from Evan to his pinky a few times before linking it with his own.  
“You’re such a nerd,” Jared said as the two shook their fingers.  
“I know. But so are you. Read to me!”  
“Bossy.”  
Jared began reading robotically, but as he awoke, and was drawn more into the story, he began to get into the emotions, and even began to give the characters different voices.  
Evan watched the sun rise serenely over the mountain through the loft windows. He heard their mothers waking up and shuffling around the kitchen making coffee. He found his mind wandering from the story being read. He wondered if this is what it felt like to have friends. It was nice, to have someone to talk to when he couldn’t sleep.  
“Are you even paying attention?” Jared invaded Evan’s thoughts.  
“What? Oh, sorry,” Evan said sheepishly.  
“I’m giving you my top notch performance here and you’re not even listening?”  
“I’m sorry! I was just thinking.” Jared closed his book and moved closer to Evan.  
“About what?” Jared asked.  
“I…” Evan blushed, “It’s embarrassing.”  
“Ooh,” Jared’s eyes lit up, “were you thinking about that hot student teacher?”  
“What? What are you- no, no I wasn’t,” Evan stammered.  
“Were you thinking about committing a murder?” Jared asked.  
“Oh my god, no!” Evan exclaimed.  
“Then what?”  
“It’s just… ugh, don’t laugh.”  
“No promises.”  
“I was thinking about how nice it is to… have friends.”  
“Family friends,” Jared corrected, out of habit. But when he saw the look on Evan’s face he regretted it.  
“But… yeah. I know what you mean,” He finished. There was a moment of silence before Evan said, “Breakfast?”  
“Definitely breakfast,” Jared agreed.

“Did I hear your voices at 6 am?” Emily asked as soon as they entered the kitchen.  
“Geez, can I eat a bagel before you start interrogating me?” Jared said as he was pulled into a hug.  
“Yeah, I woke Jared up early today,” Evan explained.  
“Maybe you can get him to wake up early every day!” Emily exclaimed. Jared and Evan made eye contact, silently agreeing not to tell her just what time it had been, or the good-morning-pranks the pair had shared.  
Heidi padded into the room wearing her slippers.   
“Last full day!” She announced.  
“We aren’t staying for the last day of Hanukkah?” Jared asked. Heidi sighed.  
“No, unfortunately I got called into work tomorrow evening, so I have to take us home early,” Heidi seemed incredibly apologetic, and it made Jared want to hug her (although he never would).  
“The joys of being a nurse, right?”  
“Oh, don’t stress so much, Heidi!” Mrs. Kleinman comforted, “We’re spending a week in a beautiful cabin! We all owe you a big thank you,” She looked pointedly at Jared as she said this. Jared made a show of sighing loudly before saying, “Thank you Ms. Hansen.” Heidi blushed, the same way Evan does. “Call me Heidi,” She smiled into her coffee.  
“What have you boys been up to?” Emily asked.  
“We’ve been reading The Lightning Thief!” Evan answered, before Jared could interject. Jared looked at Evan as if he’d just done something unforgivable.  
“Really!” Emily mused.  
“Yeah well-” Jared sputtered, trying his best to look like he didn’t care, “That’s what happens when you take away my laptop! I’m forced to… read books!” He said it as if it were the worst punishment in the world. Everyone in the room in the room knew the truth. Heidi gave Jared a sad smile before turning to Emily and beginning some conversation about marriage.  
“Come on, Jared! We have a story to finish!” Evan pushed excitedly. Jared rolled his eyes, but followed Evan nonetheless.

The two of them read until the sun had set, until Jared was turning the last page of the novel. They even read the acknowledgments. When the story was finished, they sat in silence, soaking in the book and the emotions it carried. Finally, Evan spoke.  
“Thank you for… spending time with me.”  
“I didn’t have much of a choice, did I?” Jared shot back.  
“You say that but… you did, though. And you don’t have to admit it but… let me thank you for it, okay? Thank you for this week.” Jared tried very hard not to blush. He wasn’t used to people seeing through him like that. 

“Last menorah lighting together,” Emily said sadly.  
“That means any last gifts need to be given tonight,” Heidi pointed her eyes at Evan.  
“Yeah, yeah,” Evan muttered.  
The blessings were more emotional than usual, especially considering it wasn’t even actually the last day of Hanukkah. The four of them all felt the weight of The Last Night Together. When they had finished, Jared looked expectantly at Evan.   
“So I… I um,” Evan stuttered. He took a deep breath. “I got you something and I don’t know if maybe it’s too much or if you already have one and there’s a gift receipt in the box just in case but uh… yeah. Here.” Evan robotically held up the wrapped box. Jared snatched it hungrily and tore the wrapping paper right off. When he saw what the gift was, he stilled.  
“Evan… you got me a fucking switch?” He asked in disbelief. Emily smacked him lightly on the back of the head at the curse. Evan scratched the back of his head shyly.  
“Yeah… it was on sale so…” Jared began to laugh. Evan turned bright red.  
“What?” He asked urgently, “Did I do something wrong? Do you already have one?”  
“No,” Jared answered, “It’s just… I got you a sweater from the gift shop. And you got me a switch!” Jared kept laughing, seemingly in on a joke only he understood. When he finally calmed down he looked at Evan, and said, as sincerely as Evan had ever heard him, “Thank you.” Jared handed Evan a gift bag with no tissue paper. Evan peeked inside to find a knit sweater, designed with the silhouette of the mountain and the trees.  
“Jared, I love it,” Evan spoke.  
“You don’t have to pretend to like it,” Jared defended.  
“I’m not!” Evan responded. “Look,” He said, before ripping the tag off, and slipping the sweater on over his t-shirt. Jared rolled his eyes, for the millionth time this week, and gave Evan a smile.  
“Okay, come on, guys,” Heidi interjected the moment, “It’s movie time!” The two families had a tradition of watching a movie together on the last night of vacations together. They piled onto the couch in the living area, and watched Up. By the end of the movie, there was not a dry eye in the room.

The next morning, the cabin was filled with the chaos of cleaning up. Jared and Evan struggled to roll their sleeping bags back into their carriers, Heidi searched frantically for the car keys. Everything was a blur. It moved like a montage in Evans head, he knew it would be a long while before he felt this comfort again. Heidi handed back their respective devices, and the car ride home was once again silent. Evan texted Jared a game of 8-ball, but got no response.  
When Evan was home, the loneliness set in. He messaged Jared again, and again got no response. The house was empty and bare, no decorations, no family. Evan lit the menorah on his own that night, prayed for his mother at work, and dreamed of a time where he and Jared could be friends in the real world.


End file.
